Sometimes I hear voices in my head. If I were to be totally honest, I’ve been known on more than one occasion to have full blown conversations with these voices. The other night, for example, I was sitting at Starbucks relishing the time I had all to myself when a familiar voice chimed in.
“Excuse me”, she asked. “Don’t you have something you should be doing”.
“Actually, no”. I replied. “My husband gave me the “night off”. I’m just going to hang here at Starbucks and read and write and… enjoy”
“You should have put the baby to bed. Nick will have a hard time getting her to go down.”
“He was insistent he could handle it. Besides, the kids love time alone with daddy”.
“He will let them stay up late. They’ll be tired in the morning. He will let them eat junk food, and then forget to brush their teeth. Your son will probably pass out from exhaustion and then pee the bed. You’ll be so behind on laundry tomorrow and your kids will be cranky from lack of sleep. You’ll get frustrated, send them up for an early nap. While in his room, your son will leap from the top bunk and break an arm. You should go home. You should go home right now!”
I begin to concede, ” I have been here 10 minutes already. I do feel somewhat refreshed. I’ll try again another night. ”
As I am packing up my book and notebook, she makes another remark. “After all you want to be like the Proverbs 31 wife, right? She would never take a night off.”
I stop. “Wait… what? Are you sure? Is that true?”
I opened my Bible to Proverbs 31 and began to investigate whether being a wife of noble character, meant never taking any time for myself. It was like the scripture burst off the page and into my heart. Proverbs 31:25
She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future!
“Ah ha” I thought. “She laughs! She laughs, so doesn’t that mean she’s doing something she enjoys?”
She laughs without a care in the world! She isn’t worried if she’ll have enough time to finish her quilt (22), or if her field wont sell (16), or if her alarm doesn’t go off and she sleeps in (15). She laughs because she has established a pattern of love to her husband, children, and to others. She laughs because that pattern allows her to take breaks and enjoy the fruit of her labor. More importantly, she laughs because she knows that after working hard to do the very best she can with what God has entrusted her, all she can do is just that, her best. She laughs because she trust in a God who holds her future and the future of her family in the palm of His hands.
I listened to my thoughts a minute to see if “she” would respond, but it was just me. I smiled to myself, thankful that God had empowered me to take my thoughts captive (2 Cor 10:5) and bury them in the truth of His word. Thankful for a real and living God, who is always faithful to guide and protect me. With peace in my heart, I laughed, kicked up my feet, and continued to enjoy my “night off”.