The 1 gift you can’t return

Words are a gift, use them wisely.

There are two kinds of people in the world: those who live to give, and those who live to receive. Here are 8 characteristics of each:

  1. Receiver’s motto, “The gift is for me, so it’s about me.”
  • Will return a gift card (there are websites now that make it possible for you to sell your gift cards for cash)
  • Difficult to surprise because they are particular about what they like
  • Easy to shop for because they usually tell you exactly what they want
  • Don’t usually consider the givers feelings when returning gifts
  • Give less often but with more consideration
  • Gifts from them are well planned and thought out
  • Gifts from them rarely need returning
  • Are not offended by returned gifts
  1. Giver’s motto, “The gift is from me, so it’s about me.”
  • Rarely returns gifts
  • Will withhold gifts if they think they wont be received
  • Easy to surprise because they rarely tell you what they want
  • Hard to shop for because they rarely tell you what they want
  • Don’t always consider the receivers likes/dislikes when buying gifts
  • Give often
  • Gifts are spontaneous
  • Takes offense to returned gifts

Whether you consider yourself a giver or a receiver, there are some things that can never be returned, words. Words have the power to hate and the power to heal, and once you give them, you can never take them back. Similarly, if you fail to give the words that bring healing, you may not get another chance.

What is the solution? Watch your words.

Psalm 141:3 Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.

When God monitors our mouth we can be sure that the words we speak will bring others healing or bring us conviction.

If you’ve spoken hurtful words, you can’t take them back, but there is something you can do.

  1. Remember– Take responsibility for your words by remembering them. This might keep you from re-using them in the future.
  2. Repent– Admit that what you said was hurtful and make no excuse for your lack of self-control. Ask God to forgive you and help you speak kind words in the future.
  3. Reconcile– Go to that person. Don’t assume it will just blow over. Humble yourself by apologizing and ask them to join you in praying for self-control with your speech.

If you’ve held back encouragement, start today! Don’t let your own insecurities hold you back; tell someone how special you think they are!

Join this conversation:

Are you a giver or a receiver? What are some characteristics I missed? What are some obstacles that cause you to speak hurtful words or withhold encouragement?

I’d love to pray for you.

Asking God to edit our words this week.

Lv Shaena

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5 thoughts on “The 1 gift you can’t return

  1. As you & many know, I am definitely a receiver, which is a bit embarrassing to admit. ;o)
    To answer your question on what causes me to speak hurtful words, that’s a tough one. I know there are many factors that play into this one & each scenario may vary. However, I honestly think one of my biggest culprits is being too comfortable with someone. What I mean by that is when I comfortable with or like a person, I tend to joke around with them, which can often come out as rude or hurtful. It’s not my intention, but if I step back & see if for what it is, I realize I just seem plain rude. I grew up in a joking & sarcastic home, so it’s taken me years to realize how it can come across to those who haven’t grown up in such a “humorous” environment & that I can’t use my upbringing as an excuse. Rude is rude, no matter how sugar coated. Good thing God doesn’t let me stay as I am & is finishing the work He’s begun in me! Please pray His kindness flows from my lips to all around me.

    • Lol Nichol. It’s a little embarrassing to be either when you only look at the negatives, but the positives echo the heart of God. A receiver gives good gifts!

      Thanks for being so open and honest. I can totally relate. There is definitely a balance between wanting to be real and be yourself and remembering your life is not your own. What’s natural to us is sometimes hurtful to others. I am so thankful God overs His word as our editor.

      BTW, you are so special!

  2. Shaena,
    I knew you were gifted at teaching but I had no idea you were such a great writer. I just discovered your blog and went back and read every one. Your blogs are so encouraging, inspiring, thought provoking and funny. I love it! Thanks for sharing your heart. 🙂

    • Thanks Alaina. That’s a wonderful encouragement. I feel really inspired to put as much Truth out on the Internet as I can and by whatever means. I think if more women believed that God would show Himself strong on their behalf they would trust in him and not in lies. It is one thing to believe in God, but believing God is powerful.
      Lv and miss you guys. Wish I was coming this week.
      xoxo Shaena

  3. I wish you could have come too! It was really fun having Nick here though, and I know that Kevin was really encouraged through all their late night talks. We love you guys and are praying for you! I am so excited to see what God does through you all and through Anthem Church. Love ya!

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